Saturday, October 6, 2012

Mastication

I gave each dog a carrot chunk measuring about an inch around and half an inch thick. MirĂ³ crunched his; Alanis swallowed hers whole. Carrots go out of dogs in the same shape they went in. You have to wonder—or I have to—how Alanis will feel when that chunk of carrot works its way through.  She swallows whole just about any food that will fit down her throat.  Chew treats designed to clean teeth are wasted on her, as are breath tablets designed for dogs.  In nearly twelve years, she hasn’t figured out that what goes around, comes around, or out.

Dogs must trust us to feed them the right stuff because, it seems to me, a dog will eat just about anything. Who hasn’t lost a pair of bunny slippers*, a plant, a sock or a rock to the family dog? If the bunny slippers feel disagreeable later (they did not), the dog cheerfully barfs them up, preferably on the living room carpet. If the dog can’t barf up the offending food or non-food item, we hurry the dog to the vet for some expensive X-rays, sometimes followed by surgery, usually on the weekend. We are happy and grateful when all goes well, even if we have thoughts of murdering the dog on whom we’ve expended so much emotional and financial coin to save. But who’s counting? Certainly not the dog.




*My second-favorite childhood dog, Silver the Poodle, ate the fuzzy bunnies off my prized slippers. I felt betrayed.

10 comments:

  1. Oh my, pets can be such a worry and such a joy...what do you do..I guess just love them.

    Have a glorious weekend my friend! xo

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  2. Oh, Pups sure can be a handful at times! Ma's Airedale (before the PERFECT Moi) Annie, use to swallow everything. She had a thing about people takin' things away from her, so instead of running, she would swallow the prize. This did not work well when she got a hold of a paper towel that had 3 peach pits wrap up in it. (don't ask), and spent the day at the vetties trying to get her to barf it up...nope. Had to have surgery to get em' out. Yup you guessed it...weekend, and 1500 dollars later.....
    The very first thing Ma taught me (after sit, of course) was 'drop'. Luckily for all of us, I do.

    Kisses,

    Ruby

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    1. Good girl, Ruby. We people learn by trial and error but at least we learn!

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  3. I loved this witty, sarcastic, and painfully honest post, Sherry! How true it is that Daisy (and even my two cats) have eaten something that they shouldn't only to eliminate it in one way or another! I have also, like you, driven my pets to the vet's office to spend money I don't have only to find out that they are in perfect health! Pets can be a handful but I couldn't imagine my life without them!

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  4. Ya, we know....bars of soap, whole Greenies...why waste time chewing, when you can just swallow!

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  5. You have mom laughing. When angel Maggie was young she'd eat carrots whole and they'd exit whole. That's when mom started grated them! Thank you for the smile!

    Love ya lots,
    Mitch and Molly

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  6. It appears as if most of us recognize Alanis' habits in at least one of our critters. I think I will put to use Mitch and Molly's comment above. Grating carrots for the Bentman sounds like a grand idea. Have a great week!

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  7. Hi Sherry!
    Guess what? You are the winner of the Silly Saturday Photo Caption Contest! Congratulations! We would like to mail your certificate and prizes to you as soon as pawsible so please send your mailing address to: misskitty32504ATyahooDOTcom!

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  8. You would think it's going to hurt coming out. Wouldn't you? Ouch! Obviously Alanis just doesn't care. Not the fuzzy bunnies! My late basset Barney ate cows off of my fuzzy slippers. LOL!

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  9. Sadly, it seems that most animals don't think in terms of "cause-and-effect."

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